We spend a lot of time talking about ritual proficiency. Can you do the opening? Do you know your catechism? Are you ready to confer a degree?
All important stuff. But here’s what nobody mentions: knowing the ritual doesn’t make you a good Mason any more than knowing the Pledge of Allegiance makes you a good citizen.
There’s a whole set of skills that actually matter for living as a Mason, for making the fraternity better, for embodying what we claim to teach. And most of us never develop them because nobody talks about them.
Let me break down what I think every Mason should actually be working on.
The Ability to Have Real Conversations
Most guys are terrible at this. We can small talk. We can argue about sports or politics.
But actual conversation where you’re trying to understand someone rather than just waiting for your turn to speak? That’s rare.
Lodge should be training ground for this. You’re sitting in a room with guys from completely different backgrounds, different ages, different worldviews. That’s an opportunity.
Learn to ask good questions. Not interview questions, but questions that actually open people up.
- “What made you decide to join?” is okay.
- “What’s the most surprising thing you’ve learned since joining?” is better.
Learn to listen without immediately relating everything back to yourself.
When a Brother shares something, resist the urge to jump in with “Oh yeah, that reminds me of when I…” Just listen. Acknowledge what he said. Ask a follow-up question.
This matters because brotherhood isn’t just showing up to the same building. It’s actually knowing each other. And you can’t know someone if you can’t have a real conversation with them.
Public Speaking (Even Just a Little)
At some point, you’re going to need to speak in lodge. Maybe it’s giving a report. Maybe it’s saying a few words about a departed Brother. Maybe it’s just introducing a guest.
Most guys dread this. They’ll do anything to avoid it.
But public speaking is a learnable skill. And in Masonic contexts, the bar is pretty low. You don’t need to be a TED Talk presenter. You just need to be clear and genuine.
Start small. Volunteer to do announcements. Give a one-minute book recommendation. Share something you learned recently.
The more you do it, the less scary it gets. And the ability to stand up and articulate a thought clearly serves you everywhere, not just in lodge.
Plus, if you want Masonic education to happen in your lodge, someone needs to be able to teach. That might as well be you.
How to Actually Read Dense Material
Most Masonic texts are not easy reads. They’re written in styles that modern readers find challenging. Dense prose. Archaic language. Assumed knowledge you don’t have.
If you want to go deeper than surface-level understanding, you need to develop the skill of reading difficult material.
This means slowing down. Taking notes. Looking up words you don’t know. Re-reading sections that don’t make sense the first time.
It means being okay with not understanding everything immediately. Some texts require you to come back to them after you’ve learned more elsewhere.
And it means building context. Before you dive into Morals and Dogma, read some basic philosophy. Before you tackle Mackey, understand the historical period he was writing in.
The Brothers who really know their stuff aren’t necessarily smarter. They’ve just put in the time to read slowly and carefully.
If you’re not sure where to start or what order to read things in, structured courses can help.
Our online Masonic courses, for instance, are designed to build that foundational context so that when you do pick up the classic texts, you actually understand them.
Thinking Symbolically
This is hard to explain, but it’s maybe the most important skill for understanding Freemasonry.
Everything in Masonry is symbolic. The tools, the positions, the movements, the words. It’s all pointing to something beyond the literal.
Most of us aren’t trained to think this way. We live in a literal, materialist culture. A hammer is a hammer. A square is a square.
But in Masonic contexts, these things are also concepts. The hammer represents authority and the power to shape. The square represents morality and right action.
Learning to think symbolically means training yourself to see the deeper layer. When you hear about building a temple, asking yourself, “What temple? What does building represent?”
This skill develops over time, but you can accelerate it by studying how symbolism works in general. Read about mythology. Study religious symbology. Look at how poets and artists use symbols.
The more you practice seeing beyond the surface, the richer Masonic ritual becomes.
Disagreeing Without Being Disagreeable
Here’s a reality: you’re going to disagree with your Brothers sometimes. About lodge business. About interpretations of symbolism. About politics and religion and everything else.
Most guys handle disagreement in one of two ways. They either avoid it completely and just go along with whatever, or they dig in and turn every difference of opinion into a battle.
Neither is good.
Learn to disagree respectfully. To say “I see it differently” without implying the other person is stupid. To argue for your position without attacking people who hold different positions.
This is crucial because lodges fall apart over petty disagreements that escalate. And they survive when Brothers can disagree about tactics while staying aligned on principles.
Practice this in low-stakes situations. When a Brother says something you disagree with, try responding with genuine curiosity instead of immediate correction. “Interesting, I hadn’t thought about it that way. What makes you see it like that?”
Sometimes you’ll learn something. Sometimes you’ll still disagree but understand where they’re coming from. Either way, you’ve strengthened the brotherhood instead of weakening it.
Showing Up Consistently
This sounds basic, but it’s actually a skill.
Life gets busy. Stuff comes up. There are always reasons not to go to lodge.
The guys who matter most in their lodges aren’t necessarily the most talented or knowledgeable. They’re the ones who show up. Month after month. Year after year.
Consistency is a practice. It means building habits. It means treating lodge as a non-negotiable commitment rather than something you do when convenient.
And it means showing up even when you don’t feel like it. Especially when you don’t feel like it.
The Brothers who’ve been attending for 30 years aren’t superheroes. They just decided early on that this mattered, and they kept deciding that every month.
Actually Helping People
Freemasonry talks a big game about charity and brotherly love. But talk is cheap.
Develop the actual skill of helping people. Not just writing a check, though that’s fine too. Actually showing up when someone needs help.
This means being the kind of person people feel comfortable asking. It means following through when you say you’ll do something. It means paying attention so you notice when someone needs help before they have to ask.
A Brother mentions his basement flooded? Offer to help.
Someone’s in the hospital? Visit
A new Brother seems lost? Take him to lunch and answer his questions.
Brotherhood is a verb. Most guys treat it like a noun.
The Meta-Skill: Self-Directed Learning
Here’s the thing about all of these skills: nobody’s going to teach them to you in a formal way.
Your lodge might have ritual practice. It probably won’t have “how to have deep conversations” practice.
So you need to develop the ability to teach yourself. To identify what you need to learn and then go learn it.
This is where resources like the Freemasons’ Community become valuable.
Over 1,100 Brothers from different backgrounds and jurisdictions, all working on their own development. You can learn from what they’re doing. Ask questions. Share what’s working for you.
Nobody’s going to hand you a checklist of skills to master. You have to figure out what you need and go get it.
Why This Matters
The ritual is the container. These skills are the content.
You can know every word of every degree and still not embody what Freemasonry teaches. Or you can be mediocre at ritual but excellent at brotherhood, learning, and personal growth.
I’d rather be in a lodge full of the second kind of Mason.
The degrees give you the framework. The philosophy gives you the principles. But these practical skills are what allow you to actually live it.
Start building them today. Pick one. Work on it for a month. Then add another.
That’s how you become the kind of Mason the fraternity actually needs.